Thursday, September 29, 2011

Sitting Still - Dinner #28

     During the past several weeks, we have been fighting to help our baby girl gain weight properly, and for a while there, anywhere from 8-13 hours of my day was spent somehow related to her food needs.  Whether I was nursing, pumping breastmilk, or giving her milk and formula in bottles, the majority of my life suddenly became just SITTING STILL.  At first, all I could see were the piles of dirty laundry, dishes, and dust piling up everywhere.  As someone who lives for crossing items off lists and getting things DONE, I felt very trapped to my living room couch.  I was lovingly trying to give my daughter what she needed, but at the same time, I was quite frustrated and discouraged.  Then God opened my eyes to Psalm 46:10 "Be still, and know that I am God . . ."  These hours upon hours of my sitting on the couch, feeding the baby, were an opportunity from God to get to know Him more!  I wasn't having time TAKEN AWAY from me - I was being GIVEN time!  Time to read Christian magazine articles . . . Time to memorize Scripture and sing hymns . . . Time to pray and read God's Word . . . And then the Holy Spirit used a sermon my pastor preached about "Standing Still" and "Going Forward" to take the lesson to an even deeper level.  The sermon was from Exodus 14, where the Israelites are crossing the Red Sea.  Pastor Sexton shared that we cannot "go forward" and serve God properly until we've had a revival in our spirit from "being still". It reminded me yet again that feeding Brooklyn is my "being still" right now.  In much the same way, us waiting for my husband to complete his Master's classes before heading out on missionary deputation is "standing still".  Sometimes, we must "be still" before we can "go forward".  Then it hit me - This is just as much MY training time for the mission field as it is my husband's! 
     Psalm 77:6 declares, "I call to remembrance my song in the night . . ."  Someday, I want to look back on these days and recall a "song in the night"!  I want to be able to remember that though I was awake feeding my baby, I was praising God!  In Psalm 4:4, each of us are told to " . . . commune with your own heart upon your bed, and be still. Selah."  God wants us to take the times of "being still" to grow in our relationship with Him!  "Sitting still" moments can be moments for just you and God.      
     Do I watch the news and a few TV shows throughout the day? Of course I do! I also eat meals, write reminders to myself, and make shopping lists while I'm "sitting still".  But God has been opening my eyes to the opportunity He has given me to know Him more through all of this - Brooklyn won't be drinking milk and formula forever!  This is my time for "sitting still" and growing with God, and I pray I won't miss out!

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