As young children, we often thank God for the tangible: “My parents”, “my toys”, “my house”. But as we grow older – particularly as we
grow “older” in our personal walk with the Lord – we begin to see beyond the
tangible. We start to develop a deeper gratitude
for the things we cannot touch with our hands.
We thank the Lord for LOVE, for FREEDOM, for MEMORIES. We give praise for those things we know to be
true about God – His mercy, His faithfulness, His comfort.
I trusted in Jesus Christ as my personal Savior when I was
7-years-old. Back then, my Thanksgiving
list would have been filled with the typical “Mom, Dad, sisters . . .” childhood
answers. But time quickly passes, and
before we know it, whole decades have gone by.
During a recent church service, I began to do the math and suddenly
realized that I have been a Christian for 25 years . . . Wow! That is a truly
incredible thought!
And while I am sincerely grateful to God for the
PEOPLE in my life – my wonderful husband, our four beautiful daughters, the loving
pastors and church members who have chosen to support us on this deputation
journey . . . There is something on my 2018 Thanksgiving List that may seem
rather unconventional.
Helen Keller, both blind and deaf, once wisely declared, “The
best and most beautiful things in the world cannot be seen or even touched –
they must be felt with the heart.”
The top-most “heart thing” I thank the Lord for this
year is SORROW.
Psalm 119:68 and 71 declare “Thou art good, and doest good . . . It is good for me that I have been afflicted; that I might learn thy
statutes.”
There are so many things in this life that we cannot learn
on the mountaintops. There are so many
lessons that God wishes to teach us through tears. In the book Hinds’ Feet On High Places,
the most meaningful part to me is when little Much-Afraid finally enters the
Kingdom of Love, and she nearly begins to cry for the loss of her faithful companions
Suffering and Sorrow. It is then that
these friends suddenly reappear – no longer as Suffering and Sorrow, but as radiant
Joy and Peace.
Isaiah 61:2-3 “. . .
to comfort all that mourn . . . to give unto them beauty for ashes, the oil of
joy for mourning, the garment of praise for the spirit of heaviness . . .”
If it had not been for sorrow, I never would have known the depth of God’s comfort and peace. If it had not been for sorrow, I never would have known the precious camaraderie there is with other miscarriage mamas. I never would have written “A Letter In Your Loss”. I never would have felt the burden to share God’s love with the bereaved in the hospitals of Virginia. I never would have seen how God could take my small endeavor and multiply it to His honor and glory.
But once further removed from a tragedy, the pains of grief can often
take us by surprise. This week, I felt
for a moment as though I couldn’t breathe when the strains of holiday carols
met my ears. My heart nearly stopped at
the sight of the memorial ornaments on our Christmas tree. The thought of Thanksgiving brought with it
the memory of scheduling a doctor’s appointment, last year, and of hearing a
baby’s heartbeat – a little life now gone to Heaven . . .
Psalm 34:18 says, “The
LORD is nigh unto them that are of a broken heart . . .”
Oh how beautiful is the nearness of God! I have walked the road of baby loss twice during the last
two years. But how many times over have Suffering
and Sorrow brought God’s Joy and Peace! This Thanksgiving 2018, I THANK my Lord
for the grief and the tears that I have known – for the valleys He has brought
me through.
In Matthew 5:4, Christ proclaims,“Blessed are they that
mourn: for they shall be comforted.”
Though I would not wish it upon others; though I would never
ask for it again myself; I believe in my heart that I am truly blessed for
having known the sorrow of miscarriage.
With sincerest gratitude, I thank God for this plan He had for my life.
Romans 5:3-5 “And not
only so, but we glory in tribulations also: knowing that tribulation worketh
patience; And patience, experience; and experience, hope; And hope maketh not
ashamed; because the love of God is shed abroad in our hearts . . .”
