Romance Rekindled - Dinner #45

     This past weekend, my husband took just the two of us up to Gatlinburg, Tennessee, for an overnight getaway!  He and I enjoyed all the romance of a beautiful cabin, a dusting of snow, a Jacuzzi, a hot tub, and a lot of QUALITY TIME TOGETHER! The baby had terrific babysitters, by the way, and everything was WONDERFUL!

     Lots of women like to complain that their husbands NEVER take them out on dates or do anything romantic with them.  The fact of the matter is, sometimes we women can be too “practical” for our own good!  We can “shoot down” every romantic idea our husbands ever have, until they eventually just quit trying!  It’s true! I’m often guilty of doing it, myself! Think about it for a minute.  How many of us coupon-clipping, low-grocery-budget wives automatically say, “But, Honey, we really don’t have the money for that, right now!”, as soon as our husbands suggest a restaurant for dinner or a date-night movie rental?! It isn’t fair to say that Hubby isn’t romantic anymore, if we never ALLOW him to be!  I Corinthians 7:33 “But he that is married careth for the things that are of the world, how he may please his wife.”  A wise and loving husband may realize the need for some alone-time for the two of you, before you even realize the need for it, yourself!

     For many stay-at-home moms, the husband is the only “breadwinner” in the family.  The sad thing is, the WIFE is often the one who solely determines where the finances go!  Shouldn’t the “thrifty” wife allow her husband to lovingly spend some of the money HE has earned, HIS way?!  I’m not saying let the children starve or the bills go unpaid! I’m just sharing with you one of the most valuable lessons I learned, back during our pre-wedding marriage counseling days – when your husband is trying to express his love by spending money on YOU or YOUR MARRIAGE, LET HIM!! Song of Solomon 2:4 “He brought me to the banqueting house, and his banner over me was love.”  A wife who immediately comes up with a million excuses why NOT to do what her husband has lovingly suggested, is “tearing down”, rather than “building up”! Proverbs 14:1 “Every wise woman buildeth her house: but the foolish plucketh it down with her hands.”

     People who say they’re WAITING to get married until they have enough money, or WAITING to have children until they have enough money, or WAITING to take a romantic trip until they have enough money, often wait until it’s too late!  Who’s to say that you’ll still be ABLE to have a baby by the time you’ve finally determined you “have enough money” to “afford” one?! Who’s to say your beloved spouse will still be LIVING by the time you get around to that “special date” together?! We are not promised tomorrow!  God wants us to be good stewards of all He has placed in our hands, and part of His will is for us to keep our families and our marriages STRONG!  You CANNOT TAKE YOUR MONEY WITH YOU!  Luke 12:20 “But God said unto him, Thou fool, this night thy soul shall be required of thee: then whose shall those things be, which thou hast provided?”  Does this mean you should spend everything you have and never save a dime? No! Does this mean you should spend your family’s way into bankruptcy? No! But do you realize what just one overnight trip or one marriage retreat can do to strengthen the love that you share with your spouse?!  Do you realize what just one dinner “out”, without the thought of work, children, or dirty dishes, can do to relax your spirits and rekindle the flame in your marriage?!  Don’t throw all of that away for the sake of having just a little more “financial security”! “What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder.” (Mark 10:9)  God means for your marriages to be strong!

The Selflessness Of Motherhood - Dinner #44

     As the baby is finishing her breakfast bottle, you smell a dirty diaper.  When you go to change it, you find that it has blown out the side, and you’re going to have to give her a bath right away, rather than waiting for night-time.  There are too many dishes in the kitchen sink, to set the baby tub inside it, so you’re going to have to wash all of THEM before you can give a bath.  Dishes are clean, baby is clean, but by this time, guess what?  She’s HUNGRY AGAIN!  SMILE!  Have YOU had your breakfast yet? Nope! And you haven’t had your shower yet, either!  Does this scenario sound familiar?  Being a Mommy requires a lot of SELFLESSNESS!!

     People will tell you that, “Nothing teaches patience like parenthood”, for a reason!  God is our patient Heavenly Father, and He often uses children in our lives, to make us more like Him!  In Luke 9:23, Jesus says, “ . . . If any man will come after me, let him deny himself, and take up his cross daily, and follow me.”  As mothers seeking to follow after Christ, we must selflessly DENY OURSELVES, every day!  Is this an easy task, when we feel like our “Me Time” has just been taken away from us? No, indeed!  How much easier it would be to get angry and say the wrong things!  How much easier to just “lose it” and have an “emotional breakdown” in front of everybody!  Romans 6:11 instructs us to, “Likewise reckon ye also yourselves to be dead indeed unto sin, but alive unto God through Jesus Christ our Lord.” Can we die to our sin, and do what is right, in and of ourselves?   In Galatians 6:14, Paul says, “But God forbid that I should glory, save in the cross of our Lord Jesus Christ, by whom the world is crucified unto me, and I unto the world.”  We can only be “dead” to the world and to sin through Jesus Christ our Lord!   If we hope to refrain from getting angry when our 3-year-old colors on the wall, then we are going to need the Lord’s help to do it!  If we hope to be patient when the baby has spilled his food for the fourth time in a week, then we are going to need heavenly assistance! We cannot glory in ourselves! Romans 7:18-21 declares, “For I know that in me (that is, in my flesh,) dwelleth no good thing . . . For the good that I would I do not: but the evil which I would not, that I do . . . I find then a law, that, when I would do good, evil is present with me.”  Whenever we try to do anything right, on our own, we find that we miserably fail! Galatians 5:25 tells us that, “If we live in the Spirit, let us also walk in the Spirit.” Even when things are going all wrong, our reactions can be RIGHT reactions if the Holy Spirit is leading and directing our lives!

     There are days when all you want to do is crawl back under the covers and pretend the dead leaves, the mold, the food-stained dishes, and the dirty diapers just don’t exist.  There are mornings when you really, REALLY wish you didn’t have a pediatrician’s appointment to keep.  It is for times like these that we have Galatians 6:9 - “And let us not be weary in well doing: for in due season we shall reap, if we faint not.”  What shall we reap? A happy, healthy home . . . Children who “arise up, and call” us “blessed” (Proverbs 31:28) . . . A contented husband . . . And a million other riches.  How do we become the selfless wives and mothers that God wants us to be?  Romans 12:1 “I beseech you therefore, brethren, by the mercies of God, that ye present your bodies a living sacrifice, holy, acceptable unto God, which is your reasonable service.”  We give ourselves to God!  We say, “Lord, I give my life to you!  There are days when I’d much rather be someone else, with no husband and no children to care for, but You have CALLED ME to be a wife and a mother!  That is Your perfect plan for me!  Please help me to be a living sacrifice for You! Help me to daily do what YOU want me to do!”  When those difficult days come, God is always there, helping to give us patience in the midst of our lessons in SELFLESSNESS!