It disgusts me when I see it in others, and yet I know I’m often guilty of it, myself . What is it? A downward spiral of finding fault with others. What does that “finding fault with others” look like? “Wait! You’re not doing that right!” . . . “Your dad left the trashcan open AGAIN, after I just asked him not to!” . . . “Are you EVER going to learn to wipe your feet at the door?!” . . . “You can’t give her the bottle that way! She’ll spill it all over herself!” . . . and so on. We rebuke, we chide, we pick at little errors, and we find fault with every single thing that others are doing around us. Luke 6:36-37 says, “Be ye therefore merciful, as your Father also is merciful. Judge not, and ye shall not be judged: condemn not, and ye shall not be condemned: forgive, and ye shall be forgiven.”
When we get in this mode of finding fault with others, do you know what is at the heart of it? PRIDE – pure and simple! We find fault, because we have this notion that WE could do it much better! If it were US with that job, we wouldn’t be late for supper! If it were US doing the laundry, we wouldn’t let the clothes sit in the dryer until they were all wrinkled! WE always do everything to perfection! Or do we? . . . There have been a few times in our marriage when Brandon has finally had to say to me, “I just can’t do anything right anymore, can I?!” Then I sadly realize that I have, once again, stepped onto that downward spiral of finding fault with others. More often than not, when we step back and take a look, we find that WE are the ones who are truly at fault! Matthew 7:3 “And why beholdest thou the mote that is in thy brother’s eye, but considerest not the beam that is in thine own eye?” WE are the ones with sin in our lives and things that need correcting!
Romans 14:4 says, “Who art thou that judgest another man’s servant? to his own master he standeth or falleth . . .” GOD is that other person’s Master! He alone knows whether or not that person is truly standing or falling. Do you know everything that other person has gone through? Do you know where they are in their spiritual journey? No, you do not! In I Samuel 16:7, God declares, “ . . . for the LORD seeth not as man seeth; for man looketh on the outward appearance, but the LORD looketh on the heart.” Do YOU understand that person’s motives, when they do something a certain way? Do YOU know whether or not they honestly forgot to do what you asked of them?
The Bible teaches that we had better be wary of judging other people a certain way. Matthew 7:1-2 commands, “Judge not, that ye be not judged. For with what judgment ye judge, ye shall be judged: and with what measure ye mete, it shall be measured to you again.” Do you realize that when you pick at others and constantly find fault with them, someone may one day do the same to you? Would you like someone looking at YOUR work and never being satisfied? Would you like someone judging YOUR motives wrongly? James 2:12 reminds us, “So speak ye, and so do, as they that shall be judged by the law of liberty.” We will one day be judged by GOD! How will WE measure up? God says we had much better examine our OWN hearts and lives, instead of looking for faults in those around us.
I think that sometimes we do not even stop to realize how detrimental and hurtful our judging comments can be. We do not think about how much damage we can do to the heart of a spouse or a child. As a Christian, shouldn’t we be trying to ENCOURAGE instead of DISCOURAGE? I guarantee, we would be much happier people, if we worried more about correcting what is WRONG in our own heart, and looking for what is RIGHT in the hearts of others! Philippians 2:3 “Let nothing be done through strife or vainglory; but in lowliness of mind let each esteem other better than themselves.”