Ecclesiastes 3:4
tells us that there is “A time to weep . . . a time to mourn . . .” It is hard to explain all that God has
brought us through during the past six weeks . . . In some ways, these weeks
have been some of the longest in my life . . . The ups and downs in spirit . .
. Such waves of weeping and peace . . . Feeling strong, and then feeling weak .
. . But, as our Pastor preached on, New
Year’s morning, our Lord has left us His Comforter! (John 14:6) And how thankful we are, that He
did! Psalm 71:21 declares, “Thou shalt .
. . comfort me on every side.” And how faithfully He has done that! Through His Word, through the prayers of His
people, through song . . . Psalm 147:3 “He healeth the broken in heart, and
bindeth up their wounds.” This month of
January has been a month of learning about God’s precious healing – a time like
I have never known in any other stage of my life. So many afternoons, I’ve sat on my bed, with
my Bible, a hymnal, a journal, and a ladies’ devotional book, and felt God
re-wrapping the bandages on my heart.
Isaiah 53:4 “Surely he hath borne our griefs, and carried
our sorrows . . .” My Lord KNOWS, and He CARES . . . Through the alternating gloom
and sunlight, I can pray the words of the beautiful hymn, “When life’s dark
maze I tread, And griefs around me spread, Be Thou my Guide; Bid darkness turn
to day, Wipe sorrow’s tears away, Nor let me ever stray From Thee aside . . .”
Sometimes, I have been much weaker
than I expected to be – both emotionally and physically. But I try to say, along with the apostle
Paul, “Therefore I take pleasure in
infirmities . . . for Christ’s sake: for when I am weak, then am I strong.” (II
Cor. 12:10) I do thank God for these past several weeks in our home – even with
cold viruses, and the like - snuggles and school with my girls; special
projects and memories; being spiritually comforted, healed, and fed . . .
Even as our Healer, God knows best. The Bible tells us, “For my thoughts are not
your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways, saith the LORD.” (Isaiah
55:8) This was my verse for Joshua,
since the very first day we knew we were pregnant with him. In my human mind,
despite our grieving and our physically recovering from a delivery of this
kind, I thought we would be on a plane headed for Indonesia, come January or February
– but that does not seem to be our Heavenly Father’s plan for us.
Psalm 143:10 “Teach me to do thy will;
for thou art my God: thy spirit is good
. . .”
Psalm 145:9 “The LORD is good to all: and his tender mercies are over all his works.”
Psalm 145:17 “The LORD is righteous in all his
ways, and holy in all his works.”
Even when we do not understand . . .
Our support for
this trip was raised in a remarkable amount of time. Brandon had an approval
for all the vacation days he needed. We
were at a good point in our pregnancy for safely flying that distance, and
everything appeared fine . . . But then we found out that God had wanted our
little boy in Heaven with Him, and everything changed . . . As most of you now
know, we found ourselves delivering him, shortly before Christmas. It became necessary to cancel our original
tickets, because three weeks later was not nearly enough time to recover for
such an important flight, half-way around the world . . . Then we encountered
the paperwork, and the phone calls, and the emails, as we tried to get things
sorted out with our travel agency. Our
host missionary wife had to suddenly make an unexpected trip back to the States,
for an unknown duration . . . And present world events began making it more
unsafe to fly with certain airlines or to have lay-overs in certain countries .
. . The emotional strain has been difficult.
Every time we’ve thought, “We can go!”, God has said “No!”, and every
time we’ve thought, “We’re ready now!”, God has said “Wait!” But the Lord is GOOD, and His “. . . tender
mercies are over all his works.” Even when we do not understand . . .
Ecclesiastes 3:11 promises us, “He hath made everything beautiful in his time . .
.” God knows! Perhaps, we will be on a plane, only a couple
of months from now! Or, perhaps, we will have to wait until after missionary
candidate school . . . Or, perhaps . . .
“For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways, saith
the LORD.” We must surrender every
detail to Him.
Romans 8:28 “And we know that all things work together for good
to them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose.”
Even Joshua’s death . . . even our trip plans needing to be
changed . . . ALL things – our verse for our wedding and our marriage still
working itself out in our lives . . .
I have been reading through the book of Joshua in my Bible, this
month, while thinking about the man of God we named our son after. Joshua 1:13 says, “. . . The LORD your God
hath given you rest, and hath given
you this land.” I believe with all my
heart, that, just as God has been giving us His rest, He will also, one day,
allow us to actually set foot in Indonesia. But it will be in GOD’S TIMING, and
not our own . . . SMILE!
When the Israelites came to the Jordan River, God gave them
a dry path, right in the midst of it.
With water held back, on either side, they knew the path they should
take, and it was dry and plain to them. In
the book of Psalms, David prayed, “Teach me thy way, O LORD, and lead me in a plain path.” (Psalm 27:11) This is where we currently are, My
Friends – feeling God’s healing, finding God faithful, praying for feet that
are ever-ready to step into “the brink of Jordan”, and waiting to see God
continue to do wonderful things in our lives.
We thank God for the encouraging prayers and words of His
people – We thank God for EACH OF YOU! God Bless.
With Our Love in Christ,
Kristen
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